Five Times Brook Got Hit for Asking to See Nami's Panties
by TheHaplessDisciple
Summary: ...And the one time he didn't. Angsty nakamashipping for Brook/Nami. Potential second chapter, but still a completed fic right now.


**I tried for angsty, but I'm not sure how I did with that. Um... I've noticed that the 'sections' get larger as it goes on. Oops. Anyway, please enjoy!**

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i. The first meeting

He made a skull joke, the first of many that his crew would hear from him.

(_My eyes have never seen such a pretty woman! Yet, I'm a skeleton, so my eyes don't "see" much. Yohohoho!_)

"Would you let me see your panties?"

There was the obvious outrage that Nami seems especially well known for before she dealt a swift kick to the head (and luckily for her, it was on one of the rare days which she chose to wear shorts instead of a skirt).

ii. On the deck

It was a quiet day for the Strawhats-too hot to play, Luffy, Usopp, and especially Chopper were hidden away in the most shadowy spots they could find-and with no land to look forward to for at least another three days, most of the crew was relaxing. Brook, taking a break from the violin, walked slowly toward Nami. It was a better day for her, with no Luffy to yell at or Zoro (who was napping, also somewhere shadowy) to threaten with a bigger debt; it was one of the few days she was able to relax.

Brook hoped this would work to his advantage.

He stood near her until Nami opened her eyes and acknowledged him. "What is it, Brook-san?"

Brook gave her a nice smile (though he had no face to express it) and asked in a gentle and somewhat eager voice, "May I see your panties?"

Grinding her teeth, Nami knew her relaxing day was over. With a shriek of "_NO YOU CERTAINLY MAY NOT_," she stood and gave Brook a nice, new bump on the skull.

iii. After two years

The Strawhat Pirates were once again together on the Thousand Sunny. Brook, with his new electric guitar, sat on a barrel on the Sunny's deck.

"Nami-san, it's been two years, so..." He started, and gave a strum on the guitar.

"Oh, are you gonna sing for us?" Usopp interrupted.

There was a pause as the chord played out and Brook seemed to be preparing himself.

"Could I look at your panties-"

He was interrupted again, this time with a kick to the head and a shout of "What do you think?" and still told a skull joke as he lay, twitching, on the grass of the Thousand Sunny.

iv. During the fight with Hody's men

Nami had just been considered the Strawhats' weak link, and Ikaros and Zeo decide to take her out. With her legs pinned by the camouflaged Zeo, Ikaros went in for the kill as he aimed a squid spear right at her heart.

Brook heard her scream, and shouted to her. Within seconds, he was between her and Ikaros.

"Will you show me your panties-"

Before he could finish, he was interrupted with a startling squid spear to the spine, then a punch to the face from Nami.

"_No._"

v. At the All Blue

Everyone was congratulating Sanji, whose dream was finally achieved. The All Blue, true to its name and rumors, was a cook's heaven. There were fish from all around the world, and many variations that the crew had never heard of.

Naturally, one of the nakama finally achieving their dream was a momentous occasion, well in need of celebrating.

The crew stayed in the All Blue for a week, enjoying such a variation of fish to choose from. Sanji especially enjoyed it, able to cook fresh fish from seas that were nowhere near each other-with so many options, most of his time was spent trying new combinations. Luffy especially was happy with this, being Sanji's main tester (and though he had to eat slower and actually think about the flavor instead of letting it process naturally as he almost literally inhaled it, there was enough meat and food to keep his concentration).

Brook was unusually jolly, with an invisible smile on his face and more fast-paced celebratory music to be heard, and had a feeling that the rest of the crew would be, too.

When Nami was relaxing on the fourth day, he decided to test his luck.

"Hello, Nami-san. What a happy time, with Sanji-san's dream fulfilled. Yohohoho!"

Nami smiled back, almost as happy at finding the All Blue as she would've been if it were her own dream fulfilled (after all, no _other_ maps had an accurate location for the All Blue).

"To celebrate, would you let me see your panties?"

Sanji, who was just coming out to give the girls their afternoon snacks, dropped his cigarette and used a flying kick to knock Brook down before Nami could even stand to hit him herself.

"Don't ask my beloved Nami-san such a vulgar question, not when it's _my_ dream you're trying to use as an excuse!" he scolded Brook. With a deep breath, he faced Nami and Robin with a smile. "My apologies for such a horrific experience, my ladies. Of course, if you would like, I wouldn't mind seeing your panties eith-"

A stomp on the foot seemed sufficient enough to stop him, and as sweetly as she could manage, Nami replied, "Thank you for the snacks, Sanji-kun."

I. Battle on Kamatayan Island

Kamatayan Island was supposed to be a short stop on the Strawhats' voyage; the log pose needed six hours to set, which was plenty of time to restock on materials and leave without causing trouble.

Of course, there was still Luffy to account for. He was given a shared duty of guarding the ship with Robin, which would hopefully mean they could stay out of trouble. The rest of the crew went out to buy their equipment-Zoro had broken yet another sword in their last battle, Brook needed new strings for his violin, and everybody (besides Luffy and Robin) needed to stock up on materials essential to their jobs on the ship.

To stay safer, they traveled in small groups. Nami went with Brook, because from what the harbormaster told them, the cartography store was on the same street as the music store. The medical supplies and food stocks were very close, so Chopper and Sanji went together-Zoro was with them because they were the closest to the swords store, and Sanji was generally okay at keeping Zoro from getting lost. Franky and Usopp were going to the supplies stores together.

For Nami, it had been going well-no arguing crewmates, no mass panic as someone inevitably caused trouble, and no need to keep track of everybody. Unlike most of her nakama, Brook was decent with directions of both kinds.

They went to the music store first, and she waited patiently (for the most part) as Brook _yohohoho_ed at the wide selection the store offered. He constantly asked Nami what she thought about different types of saxophones or trumpets, telling her what he could play for the crew if only he had one (_how,_ she wasn't sure). She felt the need to remind him several times that they were only there for the violin strings and how high the interest would be if he wanted a loan.

After a few more minutes of not-so-subtle remarks that they needed to leave, Brook finally paid for his violin strings, gave a last, wistful glance at the instruments, and walked out of the store without complaint. It surprised her, but judging by the sun Nami estimated that they were in the music store for about an hour.

The short walk to the cartography store was taken in silence, and Nami immediately turned on her charm when she walked through the shop door-mapping paper was damn expensive.

She talked up the clerk for some time, deliberately leaning a bit closer to him than deemed necessary, before actually looking for the paper she needed. It only took a few minutes to find them, and Nami grabbed as many as she dared to hope for a discount on. Even with all the charm (and maybe a few threats near the end), she only got a thousand beri discount-not her best work, but she could deal with it, seeing how low she was on the paper.

Ten minutes later, Nami and Brook were walking back toward the ship, both generally pleased with the day's happenings. Nami kept an eye out for any signs of trouble, and from what she could tell, so did Brook. It was unusual for an island to stay quiet for so long with the Strawhats on it, and Nami knew it wouldn't stay peaceful for long, as sure as if she were predicting a storm.

She just didn't know _they_ would get caught up in it.

Nami was constantly watching out for marines or hanging wanted posters-there were many times when the crew fought with the marines because some nosy shopkeeper saw their posters. (Of course, that only happened when Luffy and Zoro were seen walking together; the rest of the crew wasn't nearly as intimidating to people born on the Grand Line.) There were a few old and dingy ones, but the pictures and names were hidden by more flamboyant posters boasting sales and rare items.

After a quarter of an hour or so, the wind started to pick up. Nami could smell a storm coming; felt the hair on her arms start to stand up. She shivered and sped up. As her mind focused on getting back to the ship (and a jacket; or at least a shirt), Nami started paying less attention to the "what" and more attention to the "where", which is why she didn't notice the nervous glances or peering shopkeepers. Brook, on the other hand, was so used to the odd looks that he assumed it was merely because he was a skeleton.

Another fifteen minutes showed Nami huddling in Brook's suit jacket, leaving Brook's ribs exposed.

"Cook-san won't be happy, Nami-san." Brook waited a moment to see if Nami would answer, but only received an odd look. He continued, "You can see my ribs! Yohohoho; skull joke!"

Before Nami could reply, there was a somewhat-trembling shout of "Put your hands up, pirates!"

They whirled around to see a troop of marines on either side of them, hidden in the alleyways but quickly coming out to surround them. Any thought of running toward the ship or back where they came from was denied by the troops of marines emerging from other alleyways. It would seem that the marines had set this up carefully, which meant it probably took two or three hours, since the nearest island was an hour and a half away, and there were no marines based at this island. Doing the math, it meant... _Dammit._

"We won't be getting any help for a while." Brook cocked his skull to the side, fingering his cane sword to keep the marines away, if only for a few more seconds.

"It was the harbormaster, which means he knows where everybody went. _Dammit_."

"Everyone will be okay, Nami-san. You may wish to put the bags down, though. I'd hate for your paper to get ruined."

Nami nodded, carefully placed the bags down, and took out her Clima-Tact. There was a tense moment of nothing-no shouting, no orders, and no action-before a commander shouted, "Attack!"

It was a blur after that; Nami could only remember using a lot of Thunder Tempos and returning to her old ways and simply bashing heads in. Her Mirage Tempo only worked once, but ended in four marines being killed by their allies-a sword that was supposed to stop in her flesh passed through mist and ended in another marine's back.

She heard Brook's near-constant _yohohoho_s and felt drafts of cold air from wherever he was at the time. They came in handy, saving her from needing to use the cool balls as often.

Then, the pattern of attack-doge-thunder-dodge-repeat was interrupted by a yell of pain that she only heard twice-Brook. Being made of bones and afro, he didn't feel physical pain often. When he did, it was downright panic inducing.

As quickly as she could (which was fairly quickly, with all her training as a thief) Nami made her way to Brook. Even if it only took a couple minutes-not even; one-it was probably the most excruciating fighting she'd done. Nami yelled as she made her way toward Brook, toward where she _thought_ Brook was, and not once did she hear that damn annoying voice calling back.

She did, however, hear other voices. Over the din of the remaining marines trying to get a chance at glory, she heard Luffy shouting her name. When she took the time to look for him, she could see crowds of marines being displaced by rubber limbs. He sounded more and more furious every time he called out.

"I'm over here, Luffy! But Brook-" Nami couldn't finish her sentence, and she choked off at the end. Brook was just in sight, lying still on the ground with a sword sticking out of his skull. The grey-blue tinge of the blade was enough to let her know that it was made of seastone. Apparently finished, none of the marines spared another glance at him.

Before she really knew what she was doing, Nami was by Brook's side, Clima-Tact forgotten by her side. Weakly, she called his name.

"Brook? Brook... come on; I know you're not-"

The sounds of fighting were much closer than before. If she looked up from Brook's face, she would've seen the rest of her crew, fighting in a rough circle around the two. She didn't, though. All she knew was that she wasn't dead yet, and Brook needed help.

Brook moved his head a little, seeming to look at her. She reached for the sword and carefully took it out-no blood, no gaping wound to stitch and bandage, and yet so much worse.

"Nami-san," Brook said, a smile in his voice. "My apologies, I seem to have... Well, I didn't really think I could die. This is unexpected."

Nami tried to deny what he was saying. They had Chopper, the best doctor a pirate could have (who was fighting, not healing; not knowing how badly someone needed healing), and anyway, Brook was a skeleton. He couldn't die like this, not from some stupid marine on an island that whose only purpose was a simple supply run; he was the future Pirate King's musician, he was the man who needed to fulfill his dream and promise, he was Brook, the biggest gentleman to rock the world with music from the soul.

He was her nakama, currently dying in her arms as she was helpless to do anything but watch.

"I'm sorry, Nami-san, please don't look so beaten." Shakily, he reached up one hand to his skull and pulled out the tone dial, placed there what seems so long ago. "Please, make sure this makes it to Laboon."

Nami nodded, biting her bottom lip to keep the sobs from pouring out. "Of course. We all will, Brook."

He nodded, too. "And... one more thing." Brook's voice was getting quieter, or the battle was getting louder, or maybe it was just the shock setting in, but Nami had to lean closer to hear his words. "May I see your panties?"

It was such a familiar question, something she almost expected to hear at any serious situation-from the very beginning, the big, scary, often emotional things (having an actual, _living_ skeleton on the ship, escaping death because her undead crewmate took the blow, reuniting after two long years of individual training) that made Nami wonder what the hell could possibly be next were suddenly just another part of the ridiculousness that plagued the Strawhat Pirates.

It was such a stupid thing, to make your final request to see someone's undergarments, that she laughed. A quiet, wet laugh, accompanying her tears, but it was so nice to know that her nakama were never going to change from the stupid, stubborn, pigheaded idiots that she knew and (not-so) secretly loved. So nice, in fact, that she answered, "Dumbass. Why do I travel with a bunch of idiots? You all... you keep... You're all dumbasses."

Brook just gave that not-really-there smile and a theatrical sigh. "Perhaps I'll be more lucky next time."

He grew unnaturally still, and she knew what it meant, but still she heard herself answering.

"Perhaps."

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**How was it; tear-worthy? Also, I've been toying with the idea (because I hate it ending like this) of adding a little 'epilogue' chapter. (An epilogue! For a one-shot!) It would just be a bit of crew reactions, funeral, maybe a few timeskips to achieving goals... Not much in way of plot. Um... Anyone have any ideas/opinions on that?**


End file.
